Well today we had quite the adventure. To begin with let me go back a couple days. We talked to a guy who said he worked for the hotel. He talked us in to doing a tour. It was easy to talk us into it as we had already planned to do something similar. This is what he told us.
You will be picked up at the front gate. We will take you in a nice safari truck. You will be given a nice Polaris razor. All their razors are maintained and in great shape not like the other companies that are worn out. It will be a two seat 1000cc’s. Then you will go learn the Dominican culture. We will learn about the area, how cigars are made, how coffee beans are produce, how chocolate is produced from cocoa beans. We will then sample them if we want. And no obligation to purchase anything. Learn about mamajuana and sample it. We will go past the school and all the children come out and wave. They love Americans because they toss candy to them (to which Art said I don’t have candy and our guy said no worries they don’t expect it. Jokingly Art said we could through dollars and our guy was adamant not to do that.). We would go to a cave with crystal clear water. But the water was only waist deep. Then we would go to the most beautiful beach in the country and swim a couple of hours. We need to wear our clothes but bring our swimming suits, towels, bottled water sunscreen and sunglasses. There would be lockers at the beach and a place to change our clothes. There would be a nature center to take pictures with birds and monkeys. And to be sure to pay for the pictures before they take them or they will charge $20 for a picture. He said he had already signed up 15 Americans for today. The group would only consist of folks from our hotel to keep the group to a small number. He would be there with us the whole time. Sounded great! Here is how it went.
Our guy Gabriel doesn’t work for the hotel, he works the beach at our hotel. Our concierge said he was a good guy and we were good to go with him. Hmmmm. They are also friends. And worked together at other hotels together. We had to walk by the other close by tour pick up places to go just outside the front gate of the hotel to be picked up. It was quite the hike toward the end we hitched a ride on a golf cart as it was to long to actually walk it. Our guy was waiting for us as promised. He made sure we showed up, collected his commission and left. It was us, two other couples and a single gal going on the tour. They ALL spoke Spanish not English. Just a guess but I don’t think any of them were American. The safari truck was an old worn out truck I am sure they bought used from one of the other companies. Our first stop was at the gas station. Yep… we need gas. We took this worn out contraption out on the highway, wind blowing in our face as it was open on the sides with worn out bench seats down each side. At one point I thought it was so funny, I burst out laughing, Maybe I was in shock but I just giggled away as we drove down the highway in this fine ol heap.
We got to the place to get our razors. We had to wait for some other folks to arrive. Four girls from the UK joined us. They were interesting. Every other word it of their mouth was the F word. Now in their defense, several times it was actually well deserved. More on them in a moment. They told us to go inside their shop while we waited. They said they would give us great deals on their stuff. That was the first trap. Our guide assigned everyone a beat up dune buggie type vehicle. We thought oh boy these are terrible and exactly what our guy Gabriel said we wouldn’t get. True to his word the guide took us over to the only Polaris razor they had and said it was the vehicle we would have. It wasn’t a two seater it was a four seat beat to crap 900 cc Razor. Because we had the “nice” vehicle we would bring up the rear in the line. I thought our road back home was bad or the road to the cabin was bad but not compared to the roads we took. Art said they were “ass beaters” for sure. Our first stop was a little market type place. The second trap. They didn’t share anything about their culture but they did let you smell and try their coffee, tea and chocolate. And you could try the mamjuana (a liquor made here) But they really wanted you to buy it and of course they had the same stuff for sale that the dune buggie place had. Of course the have staff on hand that are all over to get you to buy their stuff. Then off to the cave. It was indeed crystal clear water but it was more than waste deep……. It was 25 feet deep. No we didn’t get in. But they did have more stuff to sell there. Third trap. While we were climbing back up the stairs from the cave, I sat down on a rock to wait for the others in our group and avoid the hawkers a guy with an iguana ran up to hand Art the iguana, grabbed his phone and started to take pictures. He kept telling Art to kiss the iguana. Of course he wasn’t about to kiss it. But then said that will be $20. Art said I give you $5. Handed it to him and we walked off. He wasn’t to happy but accepted it.
Then to the fourth trap. The beautiful beach. We had to park the vehicles I think a half mile from the beach and walk in. The road went all the way to the beach but we couldn’t take it like the other groups. So walk we did. We got there and the vendors were on us like locusts. Same stuff for sale. It was a beautiful beach. But the only place to sit was part of a bar and they wanted you to buy a drink or food to sit there. A coke was $11. Pina Coladas were $25. Our time at the beach was 30 minutes. There were no lockers or places to change clothes. But there was no time the vendors would leave us alone. But!!!! I did get to take a picture with a cute monkey. A female name Thomas. She was awesome. After I had pictures taken, her handler took her back. All of a sudden she leapt back on my shoulders and grabbed my head and kissed my ear then stuck her tongue in my ear. It took me by surprise and I shrieked. The handler said oh wow she really likes you she only does that to people she knows and loves. He went to take her back and she hurried and wrapped her tail around my neck so she wouldn’t have to go. I liked her too. A true highlight!!!!! The handler saw Art’s wristwatch and flipped. He wanted Art to sell him his watch really bad. Too funny!!!!
I failed to mention we never once passed a school but strategically placed along the route we took were school aged children. They would run along side your vehicle and beg for a dollar. They would try and hand you a flower or a picture they had drawn so you would have to pay them. They didn’t want candy they wanted dollars.
The poor girls from the UK vehicles kept dying. We would be going along and their dune buggie would just stop. I felt sorry for them. But as a result our guide gave them a ride to the beach on his 4-wheeler so they wouldn’t have to walk the half mile.
After we returned to the hotel, we hitched a ride on a golf cart and the sweet guy took us to our room instead of dropping is off a the lobby. Art called the tour the “What the Fetch is this Tour” I said it was for sure an Adventure.
I spent the afternoon in our pool and Art took a rest on the couch where it was nice and cool.
We did get the hot water resolved. So much so we now had no hot water. They had to come back and fix it. It is all fixed now and our showers were great. The toilets in our room and the neighbors room were a problem all night but they seem to have gotten resolved……. Hopefully.
We had a lovely dinner and enjoyed the deck and now it is time to call it a night.
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